Bangalore and Hong Kong life, by the numbers.

This coming weekend marks a three year anniversary of moving out of our Mpls home, to embark on a rare life journey.  Lori and I gave thanks over a meal with our families and a couple of friends from India prior to leaving the US.  The time away gave us an opportunity to experience life in Bangalore and Hong Kong.  Below are a few highlights, by the numbers.

• 38 blog posts
• 38 passport pages used 
• 35 months away
• 17 countries / special administrative regions / union state visited: India, Sri Lanka, Philippines, France, Morocco, China, Japan, Taiwan, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, New Zealand, Indonesia, Laos, Hong Kong, Macau, Pondicherry
• 13 modes of transportation used: car, plane, train, bus, taxi, rickshaw, elephant, bicycle, ferry, minibus, tram, boat and an ATV
• 9 return trips to the US
• 4 languages experienced: Hindi, Kannada, Mandarin and Cantonese 
• 3 different jobs and managers with Target
• 1 beautiful and amazing baby boy 
• Countless friends and memories made
• Many life lessons learned
• Zero regrets

We continue to feel grateful to have gained this experience. And humbled by the impact it has made on our lives.  Most of all, we thank our wonderful families and friends at home, in Mpls and beyond.  You supported us, loved us, encouraged us to go, and helped us understand how much our family is home.  With love, - Adam and Lori

Welcome to the world Joseph Francis!

Lori and I are excited to welcome our new little one, Joseph Francis. Born on July 24, 2014 at 3:40am at Adventist Hospital in Hong Kong. Little Joe came into this world weighing 8 lbs 6 oz and 21 in long. He is nearing his three week birthday and keeping Lori and I with 'all hands on deck'.

We are incredibly blessed to have Joe join our family. The outpouring of love from around the world has touched us deeply. Friends, family and colleagues from near and far have shared their excitement and sent their support.  

The overwhelming kindness and generosity has been constant and we are forever grateful. Messages on Facebook, emails, phone calls, texts, WhatsApp's, Skype calls, FaceTime's, cards/gifts, home cooked meals, dog-sitters and the list goes on. Thank you to the many wonderful people that have made us feel at home and comfortable during this transition.

This little guy doesn't do much more than eat, sleep, poop/pee, cry and goo goo ga ga. But he keeps us BUSY! We have been non-stop for the last several weeks, around the clock. As we get into our new routine and rhythm, he teaches us something new each day. Truly a time of learning and discovery.  

A good friend shared some words of wisdom regarding birth and meeting a new little one for the first time, "It's such an amazing experience. It's crazy how you can instantly love this little person right when you meet them!" I couldn't agree more. It is an amazing feeling. A blessing. True love.

Joseph Francis Vander Poel

Eyes wide open

Tiny footprint

Long limbs (thank you for the onesie Sandra and Stu!)

Welcome to your Hong Kong home

Thank you for the LOVELY hand knit sweater Carla!

Thank you for the mustashe onesie and night balm Dave + Angie :) 

Retro card from the Silvera Lindemers (thank you Onie!)

Retro card part 2

This came in handy on an early outing for dad, thank you Jennifer!

Sunita, your home cooked meals are clearly made with love and they are incredible!!!

Lovely kale salad, thank you Misha!

 Delicious taco night, thank you Yui and Kayla! 

Dosh + Lola play date, thanks for the amazing support Misha and Erisa!

Dosh on a walk with Brian our dog walker, very happy pup!

Tummy time with pops (thanks for the onesies and clothes Sarah and Travis!)

A great kid enjoying a nap (thanks for the hat Patti!).

  **Thank you to the many others that have given us a lovely gift, card, meal or kind gesture!**  

Hong Kong Top 10

Lori and I are nearing the end of our assignment in Hong Kong, only a few months left.  With baby on the way (less than one week ETA!) and an impending international move around the corner, time will simply fly by.  I've recently been thinking of how I can make the most of the remaining months, weeks and days here.  What better way than to embrace the things I enjoy the most, my Hong Kong top 10.  Okay la!

1. Ding ding!  The Hong Kong Tram - Nostalgic, authentic, historic.
2. Juice Counters - Fresh apple and ginger, need I say more?!
3. Star Ferry - Beautiful view of Victoria Harbor and the best way to transition from the office to home.
4. Light Show - Best skyline in Asia...wait...possibly the world! (excluding Mpls of course :)
5. The Peak - Skip the tourist sites and head to Victoria Park, a perfect spot for a Sunday picnic.
6. Sai Kung - Great hikes, mountain views, beaches and camping.
7. Lamma Island and Peng Chau Island - Laid back, relaxed and no city skyscrapers or buzz.
8. Hong Kong Waffle - Make sure to add the peanut butter and condensed milk, yum!
9. Dim Sum - Little round boxes with tasty surprises in each one, try the BBQ Pork Buns.
10. MTR - The train system (and transportation in general) is most convenient.  Aside from the already mentioned modes, there are taxi's, buses, mini-buses and the list goes on...

The top ten list was fun.  But I must add one more:

11. People - We've made some great friends here, fellow expats and coworkers from all over the world.  We feel blessed and grateful to have made these lifelong connections.

There you have it.  I highly recommend trying all 10 or at least as many as you can if you find yourself in Hong Kong.  Enjoy some photos below!

The Tram

Apple + Ginger

 

Star Ferry

Hong Kong Island Skyline from Kowloon Side

Victoria Park at the Peak

Sai Kung Hike

Hong Kong Waffle

Dim Sum!

MTR at Rush Hour!

Peng Chau Island View

A Colleague and Friend

Green Light, Yellow Light, Red Light

Oh, the infamous stop light colors.  Used for indicating what to do when approaching a road intersection or as a performance measurement in the business world.  You stop when you see red - refocus/adjust, slow down when you see yellow, and simply move along on green.

A great book my wife and I recently read, called The Five Keys to Mindful Communication, aligns the stoplight concept with everyday communication.  In the first chapter, the author writes 'you go when the light is green, proceed with caution when the light is yellow, and stop when the light is red'.  When one is balanced (rested, nourished, focused) they are in a good state for communication, their green light is on.  When off a bit (tired, hungry, irritable) they are in a 'cautious' state for communication, their yellow light is on. When things are really bad (exhausted, famished, angry) they are not in any state to communicate at all. Warning!  The red light is switched on!  My wife and I have started to use these symbols in our communication...most commonly when the meter ticks up to yellow/red.  It can be a helpful warning that reminds us to wait and finish the conversation when the light is back to green. There have been times when we accidentally run through the red light, allowing anger to escalate and take over. 

In a recent conversation with colleagues, one of them asked me, "Have we ever seen your red light?"  I thought and answered..."No...you have probably only seen a few yellow lights (with a few reds internalized)."  It was an interesting realization to me that in the workplace I often have a steady, consistent green light, yet my yellow and red can be switched on quite quickly at home or sometimes with close friends/family. Why is that?  I know I like to have harmony and keep the peace, but why should my loved ones have to experience my yellow/red lights?  Maybe because they are the ones that can help set me straight in those situations! This is a good realization that bottling stress at work, only to have it come out at home, is never a good solution.

Bringing this awareness to communication and knowing when to 'proceed' with caution or simply take a break has helped at home and at work. Sometimes situations cause a yellow/red light and that is normal. Perhaps it is someone else's yellow light that they are bringing from another situation and you happen to be there to experience it.  It's probably not even be about you.  Either way, it takes time to cool back down to green. 

It's important to note that there are many other communication concepts discussed in the book that help with realizations in and outside of the office.  Its amazing to me how much communication  can make or break situations.  Leading to anger.  Lost jobs.  Divorce.  It is often the root cause or at least a major contributing factor to life issues.  It takes practice to control communication and interpret it, every day.

Recently Lori and I visited Vietnam and Cambodia.  These are two places we have wanted to see for a while.  Vietnam was a crazy busy place (yet moved at a relaxed, unique rhythm of its own) while Cambodia felt a bit more rustic and had a beautiful history and landscape.  Lori and I used our green/yellow/red signals a bit throughout the trip, as travel is stressful and a range of emotions can take place at any moment.  The funny thing about Vietnam is we used this metaphorical system of stoplights more than the literal stoplights themselves.  Cars and motorbikes don't always pay much attention to the stoplights.  I'm blessed to have a partner that has pushed me to see more of the world, experience life to the fullest and improve my communication skills along the way.  I'm sure we will be using our green/yellow/red lights for years to come, but I see more and more green in our future as we learn more about ourselves and each other.  I highly recommend you read this book.  It made a positive change on my life in many ways.

Red might not mean stop in Hanoi, Vietnam...

Halong Bay, Vietnam - very, very green

Siem Riep, Cambodia - wise yellow Buddha

 Koh Rong Samloem, Cambodia - no stop lights here

Leadership Lessons from Laos

Recently, my wife Lori and I visited the country of Laos.  We spent our entire time in Luang Prabang, a beautiful part of the country situated along the Mekong River.  We had the opportunity to see temples and nature, enjoy local food and take in the culture.  We stayed at a great place that had some of the best guest service I have ever experienced.  In general, the service throughout the town was good and people were nice, but the Mekong River View Inn staff were outstanding and did not compare to any other place we had ever stayed, anywhere.  On our last day I had a chance to speak with the owner of the Inn, a Swedish national, who was a lifetime hotel industry expert.  He had worked in the hotel business in France, started his own in Sweden and now built and is growing a beautiful guest house in Laos.  I asked him what his secret was to have such an amazing group of people working for him; so happy, energetic, genuine, committed and effective.  He listed six points in a subtle, natural, yet crystal clear way:

1.       Trust: Trust people. They may lose it, but you must always start with trust.

2.       Responsibility: Let your staff make decisions.  Give them power to make their own choice and stand behind them in that decision.

3.       Mistakes: Let them know it is OK to make mistakes.  "If I make mistakes, they should be able to make mistakes.  It’s how we learn.  If we aren’t making mistakes, we were are not trying hard enough!"

4.       Respect: Treat people with respect.

5.       Mission: “Always do right to the guest” Having a simple and clear mission allows everyone to work together and strive towards a common goal, it is critical.

6.       Skills/Development: Cross train your staff to be able to take on more, do more, help each other, get the job done, all towards creating a great experience for the guest.

When asked how this approach differs from other leadership styles in Asia, he shared his perspective and mentioned, “If a leader is not telling their team what to do, they think they are not ‘leading’".  In addition to his point, I believe many leaders do not embrace, practice or understand the importance of the list outlined above.  The thoughts he shared were not scripted, they came from deep within and were casually shared off the top of his head as he stopped by our table at breakfast to say 'hi', see how our stay was going and answer my question.  It was evident that these qualities were simply ingrained in his managerial style.  Needless to say I was impressed and learned something from a very wise and successful person.  You can read books, articles or watch videos, but nothing beats seeing first hand, the intangible spark of a great leader and the positive impact they make on those around them.

A beautiful temple in Luang Prabang

A view of the Mekong River

Waterfalls and a great hike, just a day trip away

Seasonally made bridge of which you pay a small fee for a 'roundtrip'

A beautiful sunset spot near our Inn

Lao Airlines propeller plane to start our journey back to Hong Kong

Sometimes even the wrong train can take you to the right destination...

Last weekend Lori and I went to the movie The Lunchbox, an excellent film that takes place in Mumbai, India.  The story touches on the power of fate and connection of two people in very different situations, yet both going through a difficult time in their life.  These characters connect through a mistake or rather as the director of the film puts it in a recent NPR interview, a miracle.  A powerful line in the movie that stood out to me was "Sometimes even the wrong train can take you to the right destination."  This concept can be difficult to accept in life, especially when we think we know what the outcome of something should be.  But what a beautiful thought, what if we let go more and at times let fate take us to our destination?

Lori and I had a chance to re-visit India for the first time together last week since we have moved away from the country.  It was an emotional return for the two of us.  So many good friends and colleagues to see, many of which welcomed us back like family.  People from work, old neighbors, I even saw my barber, all so excited to see us.  I only hope we get a similar warm welcome when we return to Minneapolis!  We were fortunate to be able to attend a good friends wedding in Chennai, seeing the beautiful Hindu ceremony and taking part in an important part of the local culture.  

During the trip, I reflected on our move and life in India and how it was in fact the 'right destination' but a few events that led up to the opportunity may have felt like 'the wrong train'.  Before being in my current role, I had applied for a job in another area of the company, interviewed through multiple rounds and ultimately was turned down in the final round, I was so disappointed at the time.  Yet, I had an opportunity to interview for the area I currently work in and if I would have been offered the original role, there is little to no chance the India destination would have happened and an even lesser chance of the Hong Kong stop.

I really connected with this film because it was so well done, yet simple.  I find myself reading a lot of content online after watching a movie that I enjoy.  I appreciated a specific line in the NPR interview from the director (as this concept is something I am looking forward to, even many months before our return to the US).  His comment was regarding the inspiration for making this film as he said "I grew up in Bombay, but I moved to the States when I was 18 to study. When I was growing up, my mom would send my dad a lunchbox, but I didn't think it was unique or special or interesting.  When you leave and you go back, you see things that you didn't see before."  

We are now in our third year abroad.  I recently told my sister, year 1 was amazing, year 2 was similar with many things annualized and year 3 we have started to find ourselves a bit homesick.  We are still greatly enjoying our time away, but also looking forward to our return.  We have obviously been home several times since we moved, however we haven't been back for much more than a couple of weeks at a time.  Upon our move back to Minneapolis, I'm interested in what I will see differently and the new destinations that lie ahead.

Congratulations Rohit and Sandyha!

Lori and I sporting our Indian attire.

The Hong Kong skyline on a clear and sunny day.

A small boat in a quiet harbor.

“Good Morning, Good Evening”

This phrase has become so common that it actually has made it into my daily routine.  Whether I’m speaking with family or co-workers, it’s a simple, but nice way to show you are doing what you can to put yourself on their side of the world.  While I’m walking to work at 8am in Hong Kong, I often speak with my parents in the US who are just about to sit down for dinner at 6pm.  Or when I’m talking with colleagues on a conference call at 10pm, they are often just getting into the Minneapolis office at 8am (fresh and ready to go with their morning coffee!).  

I have the luxury (or torture) of knowing what the freezing cold winter in MN feels like, but many of those I speak to have not made it over to Hong Kong and do not know what the weather is like, nor what we experience on a daily basis. However, those that make an effort to show awareness, compassion and understanding often try to put themselves in others shoes.  I personally find that this is not easy to do, yet it is a skill I’m trying to improve at.  I find that natural curiosity, asking questions and being interested in other cultures and backgrounds is a helpful way to start a connection and find a common ground.  The American mindset is often one that can be self-focused.  We have an expectation for others to know about us, but how much do we actually know about other cultures?  How much do we care to know? 

I recently was in China for work and found myself needing to ask someone a simple question.  In the business park our office is located, there was an information desk with a friendly young woman waiting to help.  I walked up and said ‘ni hao’ (hello) using the little Chinese I know.  Then asked her ‘Do you speak english?’ thinking that someone at an information desk must.  She smiled and as I waited for her to say yes, she responded with a friendly ‘No, do you speak Chinese?’ (note: her little amount of english was said with perfect clarity).

Lori and I are nearing year two of our living abroad journey.  We have been blessed with many experiences.  Learning about the complexities and similarities of other cultures and meeting people from around the world has easily been the best part.  The benefit of the US is that it’s a melting pot of these cultures.  People from various backgrounds, virtually every country, sub-cultures within a global culture.  It’s all there.  What can you do to experience and learn more about other cultures?  Or share with others about yours?

We are close to the 6 month mark in Hong Kong and enjoying the food, people and wonderful hiking trails.  This will be our second Thanksgiving spent abroad (last year we celebrated in Bangalore).  We are lucky to be spending this year with good friends we’ve met in Hong Kong and thankful for the continued life adventures.  

Happy Thanksgiving!